Noticing our sensory perception of the world is so important when approaching our intimate selves. Here we explore how tuning out of the world and tuning in to your senses, helps to turn on your sensuality.
In today’s techno-age it is easy to get distracted and overwhelmed by external stimuli, making it hard to tune in and be turned on when actively seeking pleasurable stimulation. In this connected day and age, it becomes difficult to take a moment to listen to our bodies.
We often have too much going on at the same time, our phone is vibrating while we are listening to music and talking to our friends over a glass of wine. Multitasking is actually a myth - if you are not present in one action you are not present at all - which inevitably build your levels of stress and cortisol, dissociating us from our senses.
With the added stigma around talking about female sexuality, many of us often don’t even talk to our closest friends about our intimate desires - which makes it even harder to find our sensuality.
Research around the orgasm gap shows that more cis heterosexual women than men struggle to have a fulfilling and healthy sex-life, or even struggle to enjoy having sex at all - with up to 75% faking orgasms. This could very likely be due to a misunderstanding about our own bodies, eventually leading to a lack of communication in the bedroom.
We learn how sex should be and how we should act to please our partner through a highly sexualised, male-dominated lens of the media and surroundings. However, we are rarely taught to listen to our own bodies and ask for what we want and need.
We can uncover our full potential as a sensual being if we start listening to our bodies more deeply and allowing ourselves to truly feel. Sharing these personal deep dives with partners or friends is important, as we learn to understand how individual our senses and pleasures are as there is no recipe for stimulation that fits all.
The more we try different things and the more we are aware of what is happening in our body when our senses are stimulated, the more we can use sensory stimulation as a tool to make us feel better and build stronger intimate relationships with ourselves and our partners.
Figure out which stimuli positively influence you:
Touch yourself more often to remember how it makes you feel. How do you like to be touched? Where do you like to be touched? Focus on the erogenous zones that aren’t just your genitals, like behind your ear, neck or inner arm.
Explore this touch using different sensations on your skin, using a feather, silk, metal, glass or crystals.
Write a list of smells that remind you of moments in which you felt happy, relaxed or in love. Check out our collection of scents we have created to either evoke arousal, or encourage your imagination.
Create a playlist with all the songs that touch you deep within. Jump in the bathtub with some of those favourite scents using essential oils and have a little bathroom disco, massaging the different parts of your body you feel most tense.
Build your own repertoire of stimulants to go back to when you want to change your mood, increase your wellbeing or get turned on. The more you and your partners know how to coordinate your senses, the more you can let go, and be your most sensual self.
Turning on the self is an essential part of being able to turn on a partner. Knowing that you have the ability to evoke the senses in multiple ways will heighten everyone’s experience of intimacy. The science behind arousal is considerably to do with anticipation, holding back and trickling elements of sensuality, meaning that the experience can not only last longer in the bedroom, but can be taken into every aspect of your life.
READ NEXT: Wisp's Story